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O ZARA, ZARA - wherefore art thou Zara? Only at the TWG Tea party in Leicester Square with Eyal! No suggestion that they are now Zeyal, just old friends from Love Island.


 
New TV&Showbiz

 
SKILLZ - remember the neo-hippy tree-hugger? A week is a very long time on Love Island so Jack’s impression will help you relive the Eyal experience...and Danny Dyer


 
cosmopolitanuk

 
DANNY WORSHIP - Jack worships Dani but not the poster (above his bed) of her dad from The Football Factory film in which Danny Dyer improvised the famous line ’I can’t wait to see your fanny’ : ’I thought it was horrible but girls seem to love it’ says DD. Is Jack a Danny-worshipper? Check the clip, then decide.


 
Breaking News YouTube

 
MEET THE PARENTS - word around the swimming pool is that Danny Dyer will not be flying out to Majorca for the ’Meet The Parents’ evening because of prior commitments
MUM’S THE WORD - ’Which reality star should not be at all worried about what her mum thinks of her naughty behaviour on TV?’ asks the Daily Mirror...
...’why?’ you respond, innocently. Because, according to the reliable red top, ’Mum and daughter boast of an extremely close relationship - having bonded particularly well during a threesome...’ Not one of the fragrant Love Island girls, surely? Say it ain’t so, DM!
RLLY? Jack WRSUP (word repetition syndrome under pressure - no, Loveislander has not ’just made that up’) getting worse! Remember ’oh my god’ four times in a row at Casa Amor? Under stress from Dani / Ellie convo he cranked up ’really’ repetition to six! Go to 0:54 in the vid to watch the current record again, and again, and etc etc...


 
Love Island YouTube

 
SHOCK HORROR - Dani convo with Jack’s ex Ellie raises possibility that he may have been a ’f***boy’ prvsly. Dani at 0:54 ’was he a bit of a f**kboy to ya?’. Ellie ’he was he a bit of a f**kboy to be fair’


 
LoveIsland YouTube

 
DANI PRVS - to be honest, Dani’s got a bit of previous when it comes to dealing with f***boys. Check her style in ’We Still Kill The Old Way’. A firm ’Get out!’ does the trick!


 
Daniel Winslow YouTube

 
F***BOY? - LoveIslander suggests that those of a delicate disposition refer to Urban Dictionary. Jack’s damage limitation exercise starts now!
Urban Dictionary

 
RSPCC - Royal Society for Prevention of Cruelty to Celebrities investigating heartless treatment of Dani Dyer on Love Island
FAN FURY - over 650 complaints to Ofcom re Love Island sadistic twist in which Dani Dyer was shown a misleading video of boyfriend Jack Fincham causing widespread fan fury...
...but, as host Caroline Flack pointed out, the show is all about ’testing relationships’
FANNY FLUTTER - just in from Ellie on Love Island Australia 2018 : ’Finally I got some fanny flutters’. LoveIslander looking up ’fanny flutters’ as we speak so you don’t have to - all part of the service


 
Love Island Australia

 
F WORDS - LoveIslander has checked thesaurus for alt ’flutters’. Upmarket and French, ’frisson’ means an overwhelming emotional response with pleasurable physical symptoms. So ’fanny frisson’ it is, then, for LI UK. LoveIslander looking up ’fanny’ now...
FLACK UTTERS - there was something about Harry (exes include H Styles and Prince H) but the future Mrs Brady knew ’he was the one’ from the minute he walked in for their first date. So who has set the Flack heart aflutter?



Caroline Flack Instagram

 
THIS GEEK? - step forward Andrew Brady who was on The Apprentice and famously said ’I don’t blow smoke up someone’s behind’ before getting the sack from Lord Sugar. Whatever turns you on, Andrew...and Caroline...


 
Andrew Brady BBC

 
SIX OF THE BEST - Andrew’s stamina lasted for six tasks on The Apprentice not counting having sex with fellow contestant / candidate Anisa Topan (ten years his senior and engaged to be married) in a blatant audition for Love Island. The non-smokeblower then ditched the clean-shaven geek disguise, got some designer stubble and moved on to...


 
E & A TV

 
...Celebrity Big Brother for a bottom wax from drag queen Courtney Act, the eventual winner, before becoming the sixth evictee


 
Big Brother UK

 
SACK TO FLACK - incredible celebrity trajectory from being sacked by Lord Sugar to being affianced to La Flack via CBB butt-waxing : how much higher can Andrew Brady fly?..
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